August 9, 2012

Well, it’s been a month since I’ve written anything in this here journal. And, I still can’t think of much to say. Because, everything is about the same.

Communicated with a girl in Russia, Tatyana, for awhile, but I know that she was only looking for a guy in America to hook up with so that maybe she could immigrate over here. She did sound like a really nice person and she even sent me a bunch of pics of herself. She is like 32: young enough to be my daughter. I was hoping that she would want to be pen pals, but I think she dumped me. Some of her latest e-mails were like love letters.

I love it in my new apt. The peace and quiet of being alone. Wish that I had a TV. One of my major triggers to relapse is boredom. So what do they do? Stick me into a room by myself without a TV! Oh well, I do have a radio and I love to read.

I can’t wait until I get a job though. I am just barely surviving on Government assistance right now. I was listening to the DJs on the radio this morning telling how many millions of dollars a year that certain people, mostly entertainers, make and I get really envious. Here I sit in my little Studio Apt., can’t afford a TV or even a pack of cigs. Looking out my window at the Vegas sky line and realizing how much money is out there. I’m probably as decent a person or maybe even more so than some and if it wasn’t for all the stupid decisions I’ve made in life!! Oh well, who knows? It’s all speculative. I just needed to blow off a little steam.


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